Form Servant Leaders Who Will Transform the World

Consolation and fortitude invigorated me as I walked into Memorial Church in the autumn of 2015 for the first time as Father X took command of the Holy Spirit and gave himself, a gift, to the congregation. I had just graduated from Williams that spring and was in need of a spiritual director for my new life as an ‘adult.’ I heard the Spirit’s whisper confirm that Father X was to be my spiritual director.

I arrived in Palo Alto without a job, but sure that God wanted me there. I originally planned on applying to medical school the next year, but I heard God asking me to boldly trust Him. So I applied to Stanford in the beginning of October. On October 9, I e-mailed Father X with the subject line, “Spiritual Direction.” I walked into his office, and he, in what I now know to be his signature move, said nothing but greeted me with a smile that conveyed knowledge—not knowledge in an intellectual sense, but knowledge on a spiritual plane—a mutual harmonic resonance between us, tied through the eternal knowledge of the Holy Spirit.

That first meeting was the beginning of weekly, sometimes twice weekly, meetings that the Lord used to etch the shape of His Son upon my heart. I treasured these weekly meetings. Father X became my spiritual director, my confessor, and my friend. I took copious notes and reflected upon them during my three hours of commuting to and from UCSF each day where I was a research analyst in the neurosurgery department. I began sending a ‘Meditation of the Day’ text to my family and closest friend. This quickly grew and now reaches 5,000 people!

I characterize this chapter in my life as Abandonment to Divine Providence. The Lord continued to stretch my heart. By mid-January 2016 Matthew Decker and I were leading an Evangelical Catholic small group. We encouraged each other to pray and pray. God used us to show his love to our small group, and he used our small group to teach us how to walk with humility and how to listen.

In February I was invited to interview at Stanford on the final day of interviews. To see God’s hand ever more clearly in this story it is important to understand the improbability that I would attend Stanford for medical school. Roughly 8,000 students apply each cycle; the administration aims for a final class size of 85-95. I was not a competitive applicant by any means—so much so that my pre-med advisor at Williams told me the only way I would get into Stanford was if I fell in love with the daughter of the dean of admissions.

Yet, I retained a disproportionate level of optimism. I was almost sure that I was supposed to be at Stanford—certainly for medicine, even more so for evangelization. God was rooting me in the community and I had a strong sense that it was not to be a transient existence. Roots take time to grow and God was growing my roots into the Stanford community. On April 30, I received a call from Dean Gibbs offering me a place in the class of 2016. God had done the impossible; I was going to be at Stanford for at least another four years. I immediately texted Father X, “I’m in. We are infiltrating the med school!” And that’s exactly what we’ve done.

The med school is a difficult environment for ministry, steeped in a progressive ideological framework devoid of God. I often come to my weekly meetings with Father X discouraged, burnt out, and irritated. Still, this last year we turned my room into a space for prayer. Father X bought us four full sets of The Liturgy of the Hours. A small community of students joined to pray Lauds in my room at 6:30 each morning.

As I return to campus it will be my fourth fall on campus, and third as a student. God continues to grow my roots. Father X continues to counsel me, to encourage me, and most importantly to remind me that I am the beloved son of the Father, with whom He is well-pleased.

Form Servant Leaders Who Will Radiate the Joy of the Gospel

“Be where your feet are,” said Sister Joannie, my high school campus minister, at my high school graduation. At the time, I did not quite understand what she meant by this. It wasn’t until I was suddenly thrown into my new life at Stanford that I soon realized how important these words would be not only to my college experience but also to my relationship with Jesus.

Just a week before I began my future on the farm, I unexpectedly received an email from Kelsey, a current sophomore at Stanford and active member of the Catholic Community. She warmly welcomed me to the Stanford community and invited me to join her for Mass during my first weekend on campus. After that first weekend, however, I quickly became swept up into the whirlwind that is Stanford “Duck Syndrome,” calmly swimming by on the surface with my feet furiously paddling away underneath. I was putting too much on my plate—rowing practice, chemistry tutoring, volunteering, research, student government. I didn’t have time for Mass, for community, for prayer, for Jesus. I was just too busy.

However, my friend Kathleen extended yet another invitation to me my sophomore year—an invitation to join a small group. I was very hesitant to join, but she was persistent while continuing to meet me where I was at. I finally attended my first small group and was immediately welcomed with overwhelming support and a fire for Jesus. This small group was more than a typical Bible study—it was my home away from home. I re-encountered Christ, began my prayer life again, connected with the Spirit through scripture. I noticed how this small group was transforming everything else I was accomplishing at Stanford. Even my friends witnessed the positive changes. I was finally being present— being where my feet were.

During my junior year, I responded to God’s call to lead my own small group, investing in others as others had invested in me. However, the temptation to start paddling furiously under the waterline crept back in as I struggled to get students to attend my small group. I knew God was challenging me to push deeper into my commitment to be a disciple of Christ. That was the moment I started 1:1 discipleship with Julie, a mentor from Evangelical Catholic (EC). Julie’s investment in me allowed me to become grounded, inspired, acquainted with God at a much deeper level. It was through this spiritual direction in the art of discipleship that I was able to rise and become an effective small group leader. By the spring of my junior year, my small group was alive with the joy of the Word.

Finally, as I continued to lead my own small group as well as serve as the coordinator for all small groups my senior year, I realized that I would have never made it to my final year at Stanford or grown into who I am today without my small groups or my 1:1 discipleship. I knew that my ministry was only just beginning. I made the decision to stay as the EC Small Group Coordinator for Undergraduates for one year after graduation while also preparing for medical school.

This is just one story among many more that are currently being written and will continue to be written. None of this would have been possible without our permanent community’s support in making our CC@S vision a reality. So thank you for giving me a fresh start. I hope you join me in continuing to give fresh starts to all current and future Stanford students who are lost and just need one soul to find them, one person to show them how to be where their feet are.

Form Servant Leaders Who Will Encounter Christ

Friend: “Are you Catholic?”

Me: “Yes, I am.”

Friend: “Why is it that Catholics…?”

Me: “I don’t know.”

Up until a few months ago, that was my answer for every question related to the Catholic faith. I had said ‘yes’ to my First Communion and ‘yes’ to my Confirmation. But, what was the point? What exactly did it really mean to be Catholic?

These questions did not prompt any significant effort to find the Truth—until college, that is. It started with a desire to belong, to be a part of a community.

That’s when I came upon the first of many invitations to Encountering Christ, which manifested itself as a Small Group. Initially, I was nervous about “fitting in”—an experience quite typical of awkward freshmen like myself. But my worries and insecurities vanished, for it became one of the best decisions I’ve made at Stanford. It became a space where I could ask questions, meet people who were on the same journey, and explore the Word. Most importantly, my Small Group helped me see—and feel— God work around me. I didn’t know it then, but I sensed what I later realized to be the Holy Spirit, moving in my small groups leaders. It reached out to me, fueling a desire to know more, feel more.

So, I sought out a priest and was blessed to have met Fr. Emmanuel, through which I received my second invitation. Fr. Emmanuel approached me one spring day, with his all-too-familiar grin and his iconic skateboard:

Fr. Emmanuel: “Why don’t you come to our leadership meeting tonight?”

Me: “Oh…uhh sure, what’s it about?”

Fr. Emmanuel: “Just come…you’ll see,” he said, still smiling. (I laugh now, because I later found out that the event was, in fact, called “Come and See”.)

There, I witnessed an enlivening congregation of student leaders in the Catholic community and listened to their stories of the trials and triumphs embedded in their experiences of discipleship. Again, I felt the Holy Spirit moving around me. In fact, at Come and See, I came upon my third invitation to Encountering Christ when I met Lourdes, the Campus Minister at Stanford. With her help and guidance, I have been undergoing 1:1 Discipleship, through which I have been exploring my personal connection with Jesus using prayer and reflection and unraveling the answers to my burning questions.

Renewal. Healing. Unity. For me, this was the Dominican Institute for Student Ministers (DISM), a 3-day retreat for Catholic student leaders and campus ministers from western universities. Together we prayed, discussed, sang, and worshipped. I was fully immersed in the Spirit, captivated by the courage and wisdom in the people I met, by the beauty of personal prayer, and by our calling to spread the love we find in Jesus Christ.

I wouldn’t say I found or discovered God. It was—and continues to be—about opening my eyes and recognizing Him in my life, for He has been here all along, working through the aforementioned individuals and leading me to this point in my spiritual life. I’ve said ‘yes’ before, and I will continue to say ‘yes,’ for I have been witness to God’s abundant love. I look forward to this upcoming year and working with Stanford’s Catholic Leadership Team so that others may too encounter and fall in love with Christ.

The Path of Discipleship

Front row, fourth from left: author Vivian Aivi Nguyen

One-on-One Discipleship is part of the Encounter Christ program you make possible. You helped Vivian discover that her role as a one-on-one mentor to an underclassman was as much a journey of her own faith as for her mentee.

BEING A PART OF THE CC@S HAS BEEN AN INTEGRAL PART OF MY STANFORD JOURNEY. Much of the seeking of Christ and community that I sought during my transition freshman year was answered by joining the leadership in CC@S my sophomore year. Since then, my prayer life has grown tremendously—growth that I attribute in large part to the discipleship that I experienced in this community. I found myself in a unique position this past year as both a mentee of our campus minister as well as a mentor to an underclassman in one-on-one discipleship. In my experience, I came to know discipleship as less of a mentor-mentee relationship and more of a relationship in which two individuals meet each other where they are in their spiritual journeys and continue to walk with one another in faith.

During my time here at Stanford, I’ve built a prayer life around three themes I explored in discipleship: listening to God, studying His Word, and being led by His Spirit. In discipleship, I had the opportunity to actively listen to God’s voice in my life through the practice of discernment. By praying and engaging in discernment, I was renewed in the mission of my studies and found comfort in the idea that “we are His handiwork, created in Christ Jesus for the good works that God has prepared in advance for us to do” (Ep 2:10). While discernment revealed to me the grace with which God endowed us, it was through the study of scripture that empowered my prayer life. Studying His Word provided me depth in my prayer that rooted my beliefs and anchored my hope. The Word equips me to face any situation with confidence because of my rightfully placed trust in God. With both the grace of discernment and the empowerment of Scripture, I began to truly recognize God in my day-to-day activities on campus, and it inspired me to allow myself to be led by the Holy Spirit. I began to pray and recognize that the source of my strength and motivation was Christ.

In my one-on-one discipleship experiences this past year, I’ve been able to root down in my personal growth. Upon this foundation, I wanted to continue to grow while giving back to the community that facilitated my spiritual growth. As such, I served as a co-leader for the Freshman Catholic Leadership Team, reaching out to the freshman who—like me—were seeking God and a community on this campus. This year, I have the absolute joy of branching out further into our community as an Encountering Christ small group leader, creating a conducive space and community for students to engage in fellowship and share in their faith. Through the CC@S, I’ve been blessed to build and thrive in my relationship with God and with those around me. After all, at the end of the day we’re all walking each other home to our Father in heaven.

Vivan Aivi Nguyen ’19 is pursuing a major in Human Biology.

Creating Community: Life After CC@S

Front row, third from left: author Maria Barba

Your support and mentorship has encouraged Stanford students like Maria to serve alongside the marginalized in society and to build on the community that she found at CC@S.

Catholic Community at Stanford welcomed me with open arms. Through retreats, small groups, praise & worship nights, post-10 p.m. Mass fellowship, and informal gatherings, I found a home that gifted me with a beautiful family. I graduated Stanford with a heavy heart knowing I was moving away from his vibrant community

Prior to graduation, several mentors encouraged me to apply for Jesuit Volunteer Corps (JVC). They spoke enthusiastically about the transformative impact JVC had on how they perceive themselves and the world around them. Since one of the four core values in JVC is to live in intentional community, I was motivated to apply. With the horrifying tragedies that continue to pervade society, committing to one year of service to disrupt systems of oppression by working alongside marginalized and disenfranchised groups of people was fitting. This was a daunting task, but the anticipation that I would be in community assured me I could do this.

As a current Jesuit volunteer, moving to Chicago has been a major adjustment. Not only will I experience my first chilling winter, but the context of where I live is infested with violence and crime. Poverty and the harmful repercussions of gentrification evidently continue to reshape those communities.

However, sharing this experience with four other Jesuit Volunteers has been a blessing. Grappling with these issues through a social justice lens inspires conversations that are provocative and honest. Rightfully, the first few weeks of living in community were awkward. We were essentially strangers to one another. Every time I reminisced about the comfort and joys of my friendships within Stanford’s Catholic community, I was discouraged that my new community did not reflect those sentiments. Yet, I realized it takes time to establish a community. My four housemates are incredibly hilarious, thoughtful, and supportive. Our communal dinners and weekly community nights have instigated opportunities to learn more about each other. Each day, our community grows stronger.

Chiara Lubich’s words resonated with me the first time I read them. It’s beautiful to consider that by the end of my JV year, I’ll inherit another amazing family.

Upon graduation, Maria Barba ’17, joined the Jesuit Volunteer Corps in Chicago.