Fifth Sunday of Easter, May 15, 2022

We are to love others as Jesus loved us

John 13:31–33a, 34–35

Therefore when he had gone out, Jesus said, “Now is the Son of Man glorified, and God is glorified in Him; if God is glorified in Him, God will also glorify Him in Himself, and will glorify Him immediately. Little children, I am with you a little while longer. You will seek Me; and as I said to the Jews, now I also say to you, ‘Where I am going, you cannot come.’

“A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.”

Music Meditations

• Love One Another --Bob Dufford, SJ
• Ubi Caritas-Ola Gjeilo
• Love One another-Mormon Tabernacle Choir
• Hold us together--Matt Maher ( Christian Rock)

Opening Prayer

Lord, help me to understand what it means to love, to understand that love is not a sentimental feeling but an action. Give me the grace to spend time with you and your disciples in this post-resurrection season learning how you loved them, and how in turn, they loved others after you were gone. Give me the generosity of spirit to think of others beside myself and to show them the compassion Jesus showed Peter, John and the rest of humanity.

Companions for the Journey

From “Living Space”, a service of the Irish Jesuits:

In the Gospel Jesus speaks of the foundation and heart of his teaching and message. These are his parting words to his disciples before he goes to his passion and death. What is this message? Is it to be faithful in keeping the Ten Commandments and leading a moral life? Not exactly. Does he warn us to be sure to be in church every Sunday and to go to confession regularly? Not really. Does he tell us to use all our energies in loving God? Surprisingly, perhaps, no!

What he does tell us is to love other people—and to love them as he has loved us. This, he says, is a “new” commandment. The Hebrew Testament told us to love God with our whole heart and soul and so on; and to love our neighbors as ourselves. Jesus has added a new element in telling us that the true test of discipleship is to love other people in the same way that he has loved us. And we might remember that these words lead the way to the “greatest possible love” that a person can show, that is, by letting go of one’s very life for others. This Jesus will very dramatically portray in the terrible suffering and degradation which he will submit to out of love for us, out of love for ME.

The only valid test: To incorporate that level of love in my life will surely call for a new way of thinking, of seeing, of behaving and of interacting with other people. And it will be the test, the only valid test, of whether I truly love God as well. Is this really the way, is this the frame of mind in which I live my normal day? Or rather, let me say, is this the way we—who dare to call ourselves Christians—live our normal days?

For it is clear that the disciple of Christ is not primarily an individual person but an inter-person. I am defined as a disciple not by how I individually behave, by my personal moral life, but by how I inter-act with other people. The solitary Christian is a contradiction in terms because the Christian is only to be measured by the way he/she loves and that love, by definition, involves other people. I am my relationships.

What is love?: The word “love”, of course, can lead to misunderstandings. The word is used by us mainly in contexts which imply deep affection, emotional attraction and a good feeling when the beloved is around or even just thought of. That is not quite the meaning of the word in this context. The word that is used by John in this passage is agape (pronounced ‘aga-pay’ (Greek: ἀγάπη)). This is not, strictly speaking, love in the mutual or romantic sense. Rather, it implies a reaching out to others in a caring attitude for their wellbeing, irrespective of whether there will be a similar response by the other. It is the compassion that Jesus shows for the sinner and the evil person. It would be difficult for me to love a Hitler, a Stalin, a serial rapist killer or child abuser in the first sense. It would have no meaning and Jesus does not expect me to create such an artificial attitude.

Loving enemies: On the other hand, in terms of deep caring for the good of another, I can certainly “love” Hitler, Stalin, the murdering rapist or any other person who causes me difficulties, who I believe has hurt me or failed me or who simply behaves in a way which I cannot accept as good. This is what makes it possible for me to “love” my “enemies” and to pray for them and to wish God’s blessings on them so that they may change their ways (not to suit me but for their own wellbeing and bring them back into harmony with God’s way). It is why the true Christian disciple does not in fact have enemies. This is what Jesus is doing in praying for forgiveness for those who were nailing him to the cross. He loves them then not as close friends obviously, but as people who truly needed enlightenment about what they were doing not just to him but to themselves. Jesus cared, he had a deep sense of agape at that moment. In the First Reading, from the Acts, we see another form of agape on the part of two early missionaries, Paul and Barnabas. They went through all kinds of hardships and misunderstandings so that the message and vision of Jesus might be communicated to as many people as they could reach. And to those who were already Christians they gave support and encouragement to persevere in their Christian convictions. In this sense, then, can people say of me that I am a truly loving, caring and forgiving person? A redeeming person, a person who makes hurt people whole again? It is all that Jesus, on the threshold of his suffering and death, asks of me and nothing else. It is not impossible, it is not hopelessly idealistic, it does not require massive willpower and self-control. What it does require is a change of attitude, of the way I see the world, others, myself. It is through this constant love-centered interaction among each other that the “new earth, the new heaven and the new Jerusalem” can begin to come into existence. It is in our hands. And we have a perfect example in Jesus our Lord. As disciples of Jesus, imbued with his message of agape, loving in the way that he loved us, we are called to do the same—to give support to our fellow disciples and to share our faith and our love with as many people as possible.

I might reflect today on the ways I personally fail to be a loving, caring, compassionate and understanding person. Who are the people I really love and care for? Who are the people I cannot bring myself to love and care for—and why? Who are the people I never even think of loving and caring for—and why? Do I only love the people of my own race, my own class, my own religion? Do I care for anybody outside the circle of my family and immediate friends? Do I love and care for my family members? Whom do I regard as my friends and why? Do I love and care in any tangible way for people who need my care—however indirectly—even though I do not know them and they can give me nothing in return, e.g. the poor, the addicted, the exploited and marginalized in my own and other societies? Finally, do I really love myself? A great deal of our difficulty in extending love and especially forgiveness to others is our own insecurity, the fragility of our egos, which can be so easily hurt. Only those persons who are fully convinced that they are themselves lovable can reach out comfortably and unconditionally to love others.

Find links to addtional commentaries on this Gospel >>

Weekly Memorization

Taken from the gospel for today’s session…

Love one another as I have loved you

Living the Good News

What action can you take in the next week as a response to today’s reading and discussion?

Keep a private journal of your prayer/actions responses this week. Feel free to use the personal reflection questions or the meditations which follow:

Reflection Questions

• Have you ever been in a life situation (marriage, having a child, divorce, serious illness, losing someone you love, graduating from school, moving to a different location far away etc.) that made you feel as though you were leaving one phase of your life and entering another?
  Was it difficult?
  Were your sad about leaving some folks you loved behind?
  Did you stay close to them anyway?
• Has anyone you loved moved on to a new situation which took him or her away from you physically or emotionally?
  Did you feel sad, lonely, abandoned?
  How did you manage to stay close?
  Was the effort one sided? How does that work?
• How do you think Jesus felt when Judas left the group in order to betray Jesus?
  What is the “darkness” that Jesus might have experienced, knowing that He had “lost” Judas?
  How could he continue to love Judas?
• Have I ever felt I had to be rich or beautiful or accomplished in order to be recognized or loved?
• Have you ever had anyone in your life whom it was difficult to love?
  Have you ever been difficult to love at times in your life?
• How does it feel to contemplate that God makes a dwelling with the human race (Revelation reading)?
• How do you describe “love”? Can you love someone you don’t actually like or admire?
  What do you think is the difference between love and affection?
  Is your idea of love a feeling that is reciprocated?
  How do you deal with having your attempts at love rejected by someone?
• We witness to the love of Jesus by who we are, by what we do with our lives and how we treat others. In what ways is my life a witness to the love Jesus talks about?
  In what ways can I improve?
• Have you ever had to employ tough love with a friend or relative?
• Someone said that love without justice is sentimentality. Do you agree or disagree?
• Jesus (Luke 8) said: “If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you?” Father Bausch said love is not repaid, is passed on. Can you think of an instance where you passed on to another love that was freely extended to you?
• When is love tough?
• Love in community has its own set of challenges: Choosing the collective good over individual good Loving those you don’t like Forgiving those who hurt you or others Being an active witness of this community love (”See how they love one another”) Actually doing justice Which of these do I find the most difficult to live out?

Meditations

A Meditation in the Dominican Style/Asking Questions:

Adapted from Living Space 2022, a service of the Irish Jesuits:

The word “new” appears several times in today’s readings. The passage from Revelation speaks of a “new” heaven, a “new” earth and a “new” Jerusalem. Jesus in the Gospel speaks of a “new” commandment. What’s supposed to be “new”? A new life in Christ, of course, is something that can come early or late into the life of a person. For many saints it came after quite a long period of loose and immoral living without God. St Augustine and St Ignatius Loyola come to mind. For others, like Therese of Lisieux, it came relatively early. She was already a saint when she died at the tender age of 24. For most of us, it is something that may come in waves. In other words, it will not be a once-for-all experience but something that comes at different stages in our life, each time bringing us to a deeper level of understanding, insight and commitment.

Easter is the time when we both remember and celebrate the new life which has come to us through our Risen Lord. The “new life” that the Scripture speaks of is also referred to as “conversion”, a turning round, or, in Greek meta-noia (μετάνοια). It means a radical change of vision, of our priorities in life. It means new attitudes, new values, new standards of relating with God and with people and indeed with our whole living environment of which we are a synergistic part.

What do you understand this “new life” to mean ? Can you say that you have experienced this “new life” this Easter or, for that matter, in any previous Easter? Are you aware of becoming changed in any way—for the better—over the years? Or has the Easter experience simply passed you by? Speak to Jesus about his promise of a new life, and what your response might be.

A Meditation in the Dominican Style/Asking Questions:

The Acts of the Apostles, written by Luke the Evangelist, chronicles the ups and downs of the Church Jesus left behind, and a little later, of the Church the apostles left behind. Can you recall any examples of disagreements among various members of the early Church? How were they handled? What are some examples of ways in which the early Church communities lived out the command of Jesus, in spite of some real differences? Today’s first reading illustrates that Paul and Barnabas, through their love for Jesus and his message, spread the good news over 1200 miles, and still answered to their fellow Christians about their successes and failures.

Thomas Bokenkotter’s A Concise History of the Catholic Church is not so very concise at some 430 pages, but you might find some chapters very interesting and informative. And remember, we are dealing with over 2000 years of history, with theological and personal differences which at times the Church was unified and cohesive and at times rendered it riven by animosity and even violence.

From Jude Siciliano, O.P.:

What is the situation in our local churches? How are we like or unlike the community in Acts? Are the poor, uneducated, ill, disabled, unemployed, at home among us? Do some people come to church for years and never feel like they really belong? Some people say the hour in church on Sunday is the most segregated time of the week. Do minorities, refugees, and others feel a part of us? Are convicts visited by our faithful?

What are some of the issues in the contemporary Church that sometimes seem divisive? If you have attended any of the Synod listening sessions, you may have seen some differences of opinion in those very discussion groups. Can you think of any?

What are some constructive ways to handle the deeply different opinions and visions of the Church without slipping into divisiveness and hostility? Does it help to remember that none of us gets to say who is the real Catholic in the room? Does it help to assume the integrity, intelligence and good will of the person with whom I disagree? Does it help to give the other person’s opinion the respect it deserves? Can we have a discussion without becoming argumentative, or worse, enemies? Can others say of us: “See how they love one another…”?

A Meditation in the Franciscan Style/Action:

Has anyone in my life been a mirror of God’s love for me? Have I ever told that person how much his or her unconditional love means to me? Have I ever withheld love from someone who clearly wanted my love? What was the reason—I disapproved of his actions, or her personality irritated me or I simply saw that it gave me power over another? What do I do now?

A Meditation in the Ignatian Style/Imagination:

Imagine that you are one of the disciples, and it is becoming clear that Jesus will not be with you for very much longer. How do you feel about having him go out of your life at this point? What are the things you want to say to him? What do you want to ask him? Are you comforted by the words of today’s gospel? Sit with Jesus a while and share your feelings about your desire to stay close to him and to do his will.

Literary Reflection:

Read the Following poem by Thomas Centolella. What does it say to you about Jesus’ exhortation to love one another?

“In The Evening We Shall Be Examined On Love”
-St. John of the Cross

And it won’t be multiple choice,
though some of us would prefer it that way.
Neither will it be essay, which tempts us to run on
when we should be sticking to the point, if not together.
In the evening there shall be implications
our fear will turn to complications. No cheating,
we’ll be told and we’ll try to figure the cost of being true
to ourselves. In the evening when the sky has turned
that certain blue, blue of exam books, blue of no more
daily evasions, we shall climb the hill as the light empties
and park our tired bodies on a bench above the city
and try to fill in the blanks. And we won’t be tested
like defendants on trial, cross-examined
till one of us breaks down, guilty as charged. No,
in the evening, after the day has refused to testify,
we shall be examined on love like students
who don’t even recall signing up for the course
and now must take their orals, forced to speak for once
from the heart and not off the top of their heads.
And when the evening is over and it’s late,
the student body asleep, even the great teachers
retired for the night, we shall stay up
and run back over the questions, each in our own way:
what’s true, what’s false, what unknown quantity
will balance the equation, what it would mean years from now
to look back and know
we did not fail.

(from Lights & Mysteries)

Closing Prayer

Lord, there are so many in this world who need the kind of love Jesus showed his disciples: the lonely, the ill, the poor, the depressed, those suffering from war and violence in their lives. Help me to move from sentimental pity to actually putting my feelings into action, Open my eyes to those in my life who are in need of my generous, and maybe even sacrificial, love. Help me to reach out to those outside my own circle of friends and family to address the vast needs of a world broken by hate and greed. Help me to be your love in my world.

Love Is the Answer

Reflections on John 13:31–33a, 34–35 (5th Sunday of Easter)

From Daniel J. Harrington, S.J., in America Magazine:
”There are two great questions in the Easter season. How could the community formed by the earthly Jesus carry on without his physical presence? And what can the church of the 21st century learn from the earliest Christian communities?”
Read the article at americamagazine.org >>

From Karyn Wiseman in “Working Preacher”:
”One of the stunning parts of this text is the location. This passage comes on the heels of Judas leaving the other disciples at the last supper to betray Jesus.”
Read the article at workingpreacher.org >>

Fourth Sunday of Easter, May 8, 2022

I know Jesus’ voice and I follow Him

John 10:27–30

“My sheep hear my voice; I know them, and they follow me.

I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish. No one can take them out of my hand.

My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all, and no one can take them out of the Father’s hand.

The Father and I are one.”

Music Meditations

• Psalm 23--John Rutter
• Shepherd Me O God--Marty Haugen
• My Shepherd will supply my need--BYU choir or Mormon Tabernacle Choir
• Prayer of St Patrick for Chorus--Cambridge Singers (John Rutter)
• Even When You’re Running—Casting Crowns

Opening Prayer

“Speak Lord your servant is listening”.

Help me to make my daily prayer be the same as that of the prophet Samuel. Help me to be open to your voice, even when it says things I do not want to hear, but need to hear. Help me to trust you as one who cares for me utterly and who ultimately provides all that I need for this life. Help me to trust in your goodness and love.

Companions for the Journey

Reflection from the Torch Project Campus Ministry at DePaul University:

As Catholics, we know that God is always there, but there are certain times when it is easier to be aware of this than others. Let’s face it, when we feel hurt, rejected, unloved, or lost, it can be overwhelmingly difficult to see God’s light. Similarly, when we follow through with various temptations or fail to come to God in times of distress, we may end up straying away with him, like the single lost sheep that escaped from the shepherd, only to end up feeling shame and unworthiness.

However, there is a beautiful song by Casting Crowns titled “Even When You’re Running” that focuses on these very times. The chorus goes like so:

His love is inescapable. His presence is unshakable. Right now you don’t believe it’s true. A better day is coming. And you don’t need another place to hide. He’ll find you in your darkest night. His love is holding on to you. Even when you’re running.

See, we may run, but God will follow. We may make mistakes, but absolutely nothing you confess could make Him love you less. Truly, you are His child and no one, no person, no temptation, no sin, can ever take that away from you. After all, “Your fear isn’t dark enough, Your pit isn’t deep enough, Your lie isn’t loud enough, to keep Him away from you.” Let me share some insight from my youth minister, Amy Hodson. She once asked me: “Is the (Father, Son,) Holy Spirit present in this room? Right now?” I said, “Well, yeah.” She said, “Okay. Was the Holy Spirit present in this room 10 minutes ago?” “Yes,” I said. She said, “Exactly. The Spirit is always present, but we are not always mindful or conscious of this. However, when we take the time to be mindful, and to simply remember this, we can truly grasp the fact that we are never alone.”

And so, as long we get up and try. And try. And try once more to be mindful of this presence throughout the course of our lives, we will be rewarded by the Father with everlasting life. In your next time of loneliness or struggle, I encourage you to do this: Close your eyes and pray. Pray, and look for your shepherd. Do you see Him? He is waiting right in front of you with his arms wide open.

Weekly Memorization

Taken from the gospel for today’s session…

My sheep hear my voice, I know them and they follow me

Living the Good News

What action can you take in the next week as a response to today’s reading and discussion?

Keep a private journal of your prayer/actions responses this week. Feel free to use the personal reflection questions or the meditations which follow:

Reflection Questions

• Do I really feel that Jesus knows me, and loves me as I am?
• What does Jesus’ presence in my life mean to me?
• Do I feel that I have to do all the work in this relationship I have with Jesus?
  What needs to happen for this belief to change?
  Is there anything I can do to be more aware of Jesus’ love and concern for me?
• People under stress can feel very insecure and may even doubt that God is watching over them. What events in the world may cause people to be stressed?
  What events in my life can make me feel stressed?
  Have I ever suffered failure and/or rejection? How did I handle it?
• In this gospel passage, Jesus asserts that those who belong to him listen to His voice. Because He knows them and gives them eternal life. Think of times in our history when human beings have listened to the wrong “shepherds”—military or religious leaders who have preyed on the weak, the poor, have waged war on countries, ethnic groups or nationalities which threatened their sense of security in some way. Have there been any leaders you can think of who have really shepherded their people and protected them without harming others in the process?
  Do you think of Jesus as being your personal “shepherd”?
  Do you listen to him?
  Are you truly open to what Jesus is telling you right now?
  What is He saying to you at this moment?
  What can you do to remind yourself of the nearness of Jesus?
• Reflect on what it means for you to be in Jesus’ care, and what it means for our world to be in Jesus’ care. Then think of Jesus’ request to Peter in last week’s gospel: “Feed my Sheep”. What sort of shepherd are you called to be, now, today?
• Sometimes, the reference to non-clergy as “sheep” and the clergy as “shepherds” seems to imply that we are too stupid to think for ourselves; our job is to do what we are told. Some find this demeaning. Do you?
  In what ways have the priests and bishops that I have met been good shepherds of the people in their care?
  In what ways have they failed?
  We need to be honest about this if we are going to take Jesus seriously.
• Do you think that salvation is personal or communal. Or both?
• Do you have a sense of “belonging” to a group of friends, your family, or your church community—(your flock)?
  How do you contribute to the whole of each group? How are you accepted and treated by each group?
  Which group do you feel most a part of? Why is that?
  Is there any group that you feel left out of? Why is that, do you think?
• Can I hear the Shepherd as he speaks to me in our world through modern prophets and witnesses, as well as through those closest to me—those in my very household, or school, or place of employment?
• Can I hear the Shepherd’s voice in our church community?
• Can I BE the Shepherd’s voice in my community?
  Will this synodal process we are engaging in help me to answer this question?

Meditations

A Meditation in the Dominican Style/Asking Questions:

This gospel reading presents a very popular image of Jesus, the Good Shepherd. And what a lovely image it is! Immortalized also in the beautiful Psalm 23 from Jewish scriptures, it depicts a God who watches over me: He leads me, he guides me, he soothes me, he prepares a table for me he anoints me. How wonderful it is to be loved and to be taken care of this way. But we cannot live forever in that idyllic and childlike space where we have no cares, no worries, no responsibilities. Life just is not like that. After a while, we grow weary of being sheep—needy, simple, passive.

This image of dependency has, unfortunately, been one which has been encouraged by religion, even the Catholic religion. Over the centuries, says Father Jude Sciliano, O.P., we have paid less attention to the voice that speaks to the entire community/flock and instead have placed the major responsibility for hearing God’s Word and teaching it on the clergy and hierarchy. This often allowed religious leaders to think of themselves, not as shepherds, but as sheepdogs, barking and snarling at those who strayed, biting at the heels of those who might be getting out of line. The end result is a timid and tentative people of God who think of themselves as recipients rather than as participants. We have become consumers of the religious experience, having others think and act and sometimes pray in our stead.

This consumer mentality is played out this way: We go to church. We pray prayers that have been written for us, with highly scripted and memorized responses, we listen to a homily delivered by an ordained minister who, it is presumed, has a closer connection to God and greater insights that we in the cheap seats might have. We receive communion, we listen to a sung meditation after the Eucharist, and we are dismissed and leave. This can give us the impression that we are recipients, observers, on the outside looking in. We are not owners, stakeholders, required to do something with our gifts for the sake of the Kingdom. Sometimes I think that we don’t really hear the words of Dismissal: in the exact translation of the Latin “Ite missa est” we are told: “Go! You have been sent forth”.

Maybe it suits us to be passive, because it is comfortable and comforting. Maybe it suits us to be passive because, then, nothing is expected of us. Do I think of myself as a consumer of the religious experience or as a true disciple? Do I believe my baptismal call as priest, prophet, and king? What are MY baptismal responsibilities, then?

A Meditation in the Franciscan Style/Action:

What are my priorities? For most of us, the first two are those we love, and personal success/happiness, however that is defined. And then we stop there. We often say that we are just too busy to help out. But ask any psychologist and you will learn that we are never too busy to make time for those things we want to make time for. We are never too old or too young, too tired, too stressed, too poor to be exempted. There is no time in our lives when we will have more time than we do now, or more energy than we do now. If we only live to serve ourselves and our own needs, we are missing the point of Jesus’ message. If we do well without doing any good, we are not living fully or graciously. We are not living the gospel. Where is the voice of the Shepherd directing me to service? How can I serve this Catholic Community at Stanford? How can I serve the larger community apart from my friends, my family, my career?

A Meditation in the Augustinian Style/Relationship:

My sheep hear my voice; I know them, and they follow me. I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish. No one can take them out of my hand.

MY LORD GOD, I have no idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead of me. I cannot know for certain where it will end. Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think that I am following your will does not mean that I am actually doing so. But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you. And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing. I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire. And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road though I may know nothing about it. Therefore will I trust you always though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death. I will not fear, for you are ever with me, and you will never leave me to face my perils alone. —Thomas Merton, Thoughts in Solitude

When Merton wrote these words he had lived through seventeen years of monastic discipline and contemplative prayer as a Cistercian. It is helpful for us to reflect that if such a man could be confused or insecure, there is little reason to blame ourselves for our own perplexity. What shines through the confusion and insecurity is the profound trust in the are of the good shepherd Pause now and in silence consider these points: 1. To know the outcome of the journey is to trust God less. 2. If the Spirit leads us, the journey is not ours alone. 3. A journey of clarity and ease cannot reach a God of mystery and love. 4. The experience of uncertainty brings us closer to our companions on the journey. 5. No matter how unsettling the journey may be at times, God will not permit us to be lost. —Adapted from A Retreat with Thomas Merton by Anthony Padovano, p.10

Poetic Reflection:

Read the following poem by Denise Levertov. What does it tell you about the Spirit of the Good Shepherd in your life?

“The Avowal”

As swimmers dare
to lie face to the sky
and water bears them;
as hawks rest upon air
and air sustains them,
so would I learn to attain
freefall, and float
into Creator Spirit’s deep embrace,
knowing no effort earns
that all-surrounding grace.

Closing Prayer

Excerpted from Thomas Merton, Passion for Peace, 227-229 Almighty and merciful God, Father of all, Creator and Ruler of the universe, Lord of History, whose designs are inscrutable, whose glory is without blemish, whose compassion is inexhaustible, in your will is our peace. Teach us to be long-suffering in anguish and insecurity. Teach us to wait and trust. Grant light, grant strength and patience to all who work for peace, To this Congress, Our President, our military forces and our adversaries. Grant us to see your face in the lightning of this cosmic storm, O God of holiness, grant us to seek peace where it is truly found. In your will, O God, is our peace!

Third Sunday of Easter, May 1, 2022

Feeding, forgiving, and helping others move on with their lives; that is the job of a follower of Christ

John 21:1–19

After this, Jesus revealed himself again to his disciples at the Sea of Tiberias. He revealed himself in this way.

Together were Simon Peter, Thomas called Didymus, Nathanael from Cana in Galilee, Zebedee’s sons, and two others of his disciples.

Simon Peter said to them, “I am going fishing.” They said to him, “We also will come with you.” So they went out and got into the boat, but that night they caught nothing. When it was already dawn, Jesus was standing on the shore; but the disciples did not realize that it was Jesus.

Jesus said to them, “Children, have you caught anything to eat?” They answered him, “No.”

So he said to them, “Cast the net over the right side of the boat and you will find something.” So they cast it, and were not able to pull it in because of the number of fish.

So the disciple whom Jesus loved said to Peter, “It is the Lord.” When Simon Peter heard that it was the Lord, he tucked in his garment, for he was lightly clad, and jumped into the sea.

The other disciples came in the boat, for they were not far from shore, only about a hundred yards, dragging the net with the fish.

When they climbed out on shore, they saw a charcoal fire with fish on it and bread.

Jesus said to them, “Bring some of the fish you just caught.”

So Simon Peter went over and dragged the net ashore full of one hundred fifty-three large fish. Even though there were so many, the net was not torn.

Jesus said to them, “Come, have breakfast.” And none of the disciples dared to ask him, “Who are you?” because they realized it was the Lord.

Jesus came over and took the bread and gave it to them, and in like manner the fish.

This was now the third time Jesus was revealed to his disciples after being raised from the dead.

When they had finished breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon, son of John, do you love me more than these?” He said to him, “Yes, Lord, you know that I love you.” He said to him, “Feed my lambs.”

He then said to him a second time, “Simon, son of John, do you love me?” He said to him, “Yes, Lord, you know that I love you.” He said to him, “Tend my sheep.”

He said to him the third time, “Simon, son of John, do you love me?” Peter was distressed that he had said to him a third time, “Do you love me?” and he said to him, “Lord, you know everything; you know that I love you.” [Jesus] said to him, “Feed my sheep.

“Amen, amen, I say to you, when you were younger, you used to dress yourself and go where you wanted; but when you grow old, you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will dress you and lead you where you do not want to go.”

He said this signifying by what kind of death he would glorify God. And when he had said this, he said to him, “Follow me.”

Music Meditations

If You Love me, Feed my Sheep--Pamela Stewart and John Purifoy

Feed My Sheep--Don Francisco--folk song style

Do you Really Love Me?-Cary Landry

The Lord Hears the Cry of the Poor

Opening Prayer

Teach me to go to this country beyond words and beyond names.
Teach me to pray on this side of the frontier, here where these woods are.
I need to be led by you.
I need my heart to be moved by you.
I need my soul to be made clean by your prayer. I need my will to be made strong by you.
I need the world to be saved and changed by you.
I need you for all those who suffer, who are in prison, in danger, in sorrow.
I need you for all the crazy people.
I need your healing hand to work always in my life.
I need you to make me, as you made your Son, a healer, a comforter, a savior.
I need you to name the dead.
I need you to help the dying cross their particular rivers.
I need you for myself whether I live or die.
It is necessary.
Amen.

From Thomas Merton, A Book of Hours (p. 67). Ave Maria Press – A.

Companions for the Journey

Peter is pretty bold in today’s account, considering his previous thrice denial of Jesus. Today’s story has poetic links to the night Peter betrayed Jesus. For example, both stories had Peter at a charcoal fire. John seems to be subtly inviting us to make the link between the two incidents: the time Peter stood by a charcoal fire during Jesus’ interrogation and today’s resurrection appearance where Jesus has prepared the fish and bread on a charcoal fire for his followers. Peter’s denial was in triplicate. In today’s setting he is given a chance to state his love for Jesus, again in triplicate. “Simon, son of John, do you love me more than these?...Yes, Lord, you know I love you.”

We heard the Passion accounts and were stunned by Peter’s denial of Jesus. He was the first among the followers, one who, at the Last Supper, had adamantly proclaimed he would follow Jesus even to death. A strong protest of loyalty, followed soon by a humbling fall. But let’s not be too quick to blame Peter. Let’s not stand in judgment, we who in our lifetimes have our own record of small and even large betrayals of the faith we profess in public. Peter loved Jesus and was well-intentioned; he spoke from his gut. He really wanted to stay by Jesus, even die for him. However, he was speaking on his own, relying on his own strengths and determination. As well-intentioned as he was, this was simply not enough. It takes more than our own best intentions and good will to lay down our lives for Christ. We need the gift of the Spirit, which Jesus would give Peter and the others after his resurrection.

Remember those “good news-bad news” jokes? There was one about Jesus: “The good news is that Jesus is coming back...the bad news is that he is as mad as hell.” Based on our human expectations, we might have expected Jesus to be “mad as hell” when he returned resurrected to his frightened disciples. He could have fumed and said, “I told you so! Didn’t I tell you I would rise?” He could have turned to Peter and said, “What a miserable disappointment you turned out to be! You were supposed to be the rock; you turned out to be butter!”

To compound the betrayal, in today’s story Peter says, “I am going fishing.” Was he turning away from Jesus completely? Was he giving up on his call and returning to his old way of life? Was he taking a different leadership role, one that would lead the others back to a past moment before they met Jesus and followed him? Peter's going fishing suggests the disciples were unable to sustain their Easter faith beyond the connection with the actual appearances. So, their belief in the resurrection hadn't been translated into life and mission. After all they have experienced in their time with Jesus, and after having encountered the resurrected Christ, they seem to have forgotten his charge to them. They are not going “fishing”---- as in going out to catch others for Christ. They are just returning to their old business, as if nothing has changed their lives! Even Peter's tone suggests a kind of resignation, "I'm going fishing,” as if to say, "What else is there to do?" Things are falling apart and the call they received seems to have dissolved. While the disciples may have abandoned their call, it is encouraging to note that Jesus has not abandoned them. As in the beginning of the Gospel--- when he first calls them and after his resurrection, when he goes to them in the locked room--- he finds them and calls them again. And note where he finds them (and us)-- in the midst of their everyday working lives. They are at their old work and he goes there to meet them.

In the midst of this ambiguity and recent failures, Jesus returns to face his disciples and, surprise of surprises, he is not furious with them. In fact, despite their complete collapse and disappointing behavior at a crucial moment, he is quite forgiving. We hear a hopeful message for ourselves today. Despite any failure on our part, we can always receive forgiveness and return to Jesus’ company of disciples. In addition, he is doing what he has called us to do: forgive those who have offended us.

Today our failures and lapses may not seem as dramatic as Peter’s. Most likely we haven’t publicly denied Jesus three times, as Peter did. It is more likely that we have let things slip or not taken Jesus seriously enough in our lives. Our witness to his resurrection may be anemic. Perhaps we can recall an earlier time in our lives when our faith was filled with vigor and enthusiasm, but is now subdued and domesticated, made quite tame for appearances on the public stage of our lives. Another old saying comes to mind, “If it were a crime to be a Christian, would they have any evidence to convict us?” We bring these “betrayals” to this eucharistic meal today. Once again Jesus has taken the initiative. He has found us back in old patterns of behavior, in failures large and small. But as with Peter, so with us--- we are forgiven and restored to Jesus’ company.

The early community had to make a decision: should they keep the story of Peter’s failures? How encouraging it is to us that they decided to keep this story and others that reveal Peter’s all-too-many human frailities. While it might have been embarrassing to Peter, it is reassuring for us. Despite his betrayal, Peter is forgiven and restored. As Jesus’ disciples we aren’t perfect; but we are forgiven. So, let’s put aside our protesting, “I’m no saint” and let’s set about the work we are called to do. And the next moment in the story lays out that work quite clearly.

When the initial encounter is over between Jesus and his disciples by the seashore, Jesus is fast to get to the concern he has. He wants his ministry to continue through his disciples—to feed the hungry (“feed my lambs”). Now that Peter and the others are reconciled and their past failures put aside, Jesus once again issues his call to follow him. This time what is entailed in the call to discipleship is spelled out---they are to address the needs of the world. However, there is a sobering element added to the call; it will not be easy. We who would strive to live Jesus’ life are reminded we too will die his death. Resurrection does not eliminate suffering or death. The disciples in the first reading rejoice because, “they had been found worthy to suffer dishonor for the sake of the name.” They had experienced the resurrection, they also experienced the cross.

While Jesus is sending Peter to a place “you do not want to go,” he is not sending him on his own. Peter is restored to the table and to the meal that will nourish him for whatever self-emptying he must do. Jesus prepares a meal for Peter, he feeds him so that he can feed others. Have you noticed that in each of the resurrection accounts we have been hearing that there is always a call, a reminder of vocation? We are gathered at the meal Jesus provides for us today. Each of us has received a call to feed others—we do it through raising children, teaching, listening, comforting, encouraging, guiding, defending, protesting, cheering, etc. (There is, after all, “evidence” that could be used against us if it were a crime to be a Christian.) This work requires food for the long haul. We are, after all, not part-time Christians or disciples for a week; our vocation is a lifetime calling. Only the life of Jesus we receive in the eucharist can sustain his followers for such a marathon of fidelity and service.

Weekly Memorization

Taken from the gospel for today's session….

Do you love me?

Feed my sheep

Living the Good News

What action can you take in the next week as a response to today's reading and discussion?

Keep a private journal of your prayer/actions responses this week. Feel free to use the personal reflection questions which follow:

Reflection Questions

From Fr. Paul Gallagher OFM, in “First Impressions” Part B:

Why do you think the disciples did not recognize Jesus? Why doesn't Jesus ever say anything to them about the fact that they continually do not recognize him? Do I ever miss the presence of Jesus in the midst of my life?

Have you ever been betrayed by someone you loved? Were you able to place your faith in that person again?

Do you think Jesus really felt the hurt of Peter's betrayal?

What is the connection between Peter's profession of love for Jesus and Jesus' exhortation to feed his sheep? What implication does that have for you?

When the disciples first saw Jesus at the lakeside, they did not know who he was. Then, with the eyes of faith, they “recognized” who he was. Do I carry on with my days as if Jesus had never lived, as if Jesus never rose from the dead?

How can I strive for attentiveness to what is actually going on around me and see Jesus in those moments?

Have there been times in my life when I “fished all night and caught nothing”?

Has help ever come from an unexpected source?

Did I sense Jesus’ presence in any of those situations?

What does it mean for me to "cast my net to the other side" to begin to live fully in Jesus?

What does Jesus’ invitation to “come and have breakfast” tell me about God’s concern about my human needs?

How can I make myself more aware of God’s ongoing presence in my daily life?

In your experience, has getting together and sharing food ever been an occasion for reconciliation?

If not, why not, and what element was needed? (maybe forgiveness, but not assumed, demanded, or publicly bestowed…)

Jesus could have held Peter's utter cowardice against him for the rest of Peter's life, but instead Jesus look forward, not back. What do I have to lift from my own soul in order to go forward?

Have I ever used past grievances to keep some sort of power over someone through their guilt?

This probably wasn't the first campfire fish fry these disciples engaged in with Jesus, but it had a different outcome. Have I ever found myself in the same setting over and over again but without moving on?

What hope does this story give me?

Jesus asks Peter: "Do you love me?" (present time). How do we go from judging/condemning our past and start living in the present?

Has there ever been a time in your life when someone did not give up on you despite past failures?

How did you feel?

Do you love Jesus?

How do you know?

How does Jesus know--or does He need to keep asking?

What else does Jesus ask me to do if I love him? ( Be specific; do not just say: Feed His sheep)

Are there any "sheep" in your life that you think Jesus might want you to feed?

Has my forgiveness of another been as gracious, generous and complete as Jesus' forgiveness of Peter?

Has life always gone as I have planned, or have circumstances taken me "where I did not want to go"? How did I deal with it? Am I prepared to face elements/circumstances over which I have no control? What do I think my reaction should be? What do I think it actually might be?

Meditations

A Meditation in the Franciscan Style/Action:

In thinking about the desperation and discouragement of those first disciples after Jesus death, I am reminded of those in our own time who are desperate and discouraged as they see their homes destroyed, their livelihoods gone and most poignantly, their loved ones lost to the brutalities of a war they never wanted nor started. Several months ago they were at peace and filled with joy at the coming of spring and summer. Now they are enduring a winter of never-ending fear and sorrow, compounded by the lack of food, water, heat, health care and medicine. Can I even imagine what determination it takes to stay the course, to fight for their land, to abandon all they have and seek a new life elsewhere? Can I imagine what it is like to say goodbye to my husband, wondering if I will ever see him again? Can I imagine putting everything I care about into one small hold-all, leaving much of my family history behind?

While we often express horror at what we are seeing happen in Ukraine, and while we express concern for those who have lost everything, most of us stop at the “thoughts and prayers” stage of compassion and limit our generosity to hoping things get better for them. But we, like Jesus, have to expend some energy and make some sacrifices of our own to share even a little of our everyday abundance with those so desperate. There are plenty of opportunities at our fingertips: “Save the Children Fund”, Catholic Relief Services, Doctors without Borders, the American Red Cross, and many others….but we each actually have to do more than make a list of agencies. We have to give. Maybe some wish to lobby their congressperson or senator to prod the USA to do more; maybe some can even take in a refugee family, as at least one household in Menlo Park has done. Jesus showed us that love is not a feeling, it is an action.

What action can I take?

A Meditation in the Ignatian Style/Imagination:

Read the gospel again. Imagine that you are one of the disciples doing a little night fishing. Try to picture the boat and those in it. Close your eyes and try to recreate the entire night of tedium and lack of success. Imagine how you feel when someone calls to you from the shore and gives you some directions that make you suddenly successful. What would you do then? Who recognizes the Lord? Is it you? Or are you Peter, the enthusiastic one who jumps in the water? If you are just yourself, what is your reaction? What does this passage say to you about relying on God instead of trusting that you can do everything by yourself? How is this thought counter to everything we are taught about the virtues of self-reliance?

Now imagine that you are Peter facing Jesus for the first time since you betrayed him. How uncomfortable is this for you? Why do you think Jesus cooks a meal for all of you? Why do you think he keeps asking you if you love him? Are you annoyed? Hurt? Ashamed? Think of a time in your life when you have disappointed God, then open yourself up to the love and forgiveness that is extended to you.

A Meditation in the Augustinian Style/Relationship:

Read Isaiah 54:4-8:

“Do not fear, for you will not be ashamed;
Neither be disgraced, for you will not be put to shame;
For you will forget the shame of your youth,
And will not remember the reproach of your widowhood anymore.
5 For your Maker is your husband,
The Lord of hosts is His name;
And your Redeemer is the Holy One of Israel;
He is called the God of the whole earth.
6 For the Lord has called you
Like a woman forsaken and grieved in spirit,
Like a youthful wife when you were refused,”
Says your God.
7 “For a mere moment I have forsaken you,
But with great mercies I will gather you.
8 With a little wrath I hid My face from you for a moment;
But with everlasting kindness I will have mercy on you,”
Says the Lord, your Redeemer.

Now, relate these four verses to your own life, hear God say these words to you and to you alone. Then speak your response to God's great compassion and mercy in the depths of your heat. If it works for you, write your response

Literary Reflection:

This poem seems to capture Peter’s growth into the man God wanted him to e:

In The Book

In the book

is told

the story of Peter---

he who denied

Jesus—

Peter whose extravagant love

bloomed like Sunday breakfast.

Also is told how he cried,

a glory credited to him

as to none other.

Peter cried to know his denial; how

perplexed he was by love, how undone

like a shoelace.

torn by love of him

called Jesus

who loved incomprehensibly,

till it seemed

even the rocks around him sang blessings.

But Jesus told Peter

what his heart had long known:

you are weak and shall be harvested

like a field of wheat

ripe in October.

Around you the weeds and flowers cluster

eager to gather in your strength.

Said Jesus further:

Peter, be cut, sifted

measured out.

Let love be your source and their ground,

In you let them find root.

Rev. Ed Ingebretzen,S.J.

Literary Reflection:

Enjoy this poetic version of the gospel story by Father Michael J. Kennedy, S.J.

Too Good to be True

(3rd Sunday of Easter)

Though it was

An expectedly tense

Meeting of the betrayed

And his embarrassed traitor

Still the scene at the fish fry at

The shore where the Master

Waited for the disciples

Took a surprising turn

For no penalty was

Enforced or even hinted

Just the suggestion of fish

And Peter must have been

Astounded that it looked like

He might not be punished

Or even scolded one

Teensy weensy bit

Again and again

He asked him

To share

In the

Feast

And the author makes a

Nice showing of balance

For Peter is given the chance

To tell him three times that he

Loved him just as three times

He had denied him yet there

Really is no balance at all

For the Lord simply gives

Undeserved or earned

Forgiveness showing

Yet again that this

Good News

Really is too

Good to be

True.

Closing Prayer

From “Sacred Space 2022”, a service of the Irish Jesuits:

Jesus you meet me at the water’s edge of my ordinary life. You accept me lovingly, you encourage me, you invite me to abundance. Nourished by the food of your word, warmed by the fire of your unfailing love, May I, in turn, nourish, heal, and love those I meet today.

Second Sunday of Easter, April 24, 2022

What is faith? What is the role of doubt in faith?

John 20:19–31

In the evening of that same day, the first day of the week, the doors were closed in the room where the disciples were, for fear of the Jews. Jesus came and stood among them. He said to them, ‘Peace be with you,’ and, after saying this, he showed them his hands and his side. The disciples were filled with joy at seeing the Lord, and he said to them again, ‘Peace be with you. As the Father sent me, so am I sending you.’

After saying this he breathed on them and said: ‘Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive anyone’s sins, they are forgiven; if you retain anyone’s sins, they are retained.’

Thomas, called the Twin, who was one of the Twelve, was not with them when Jesus came.

So the other disciples said to him, ‘We have seen the Lord,’ but he answered, ‘Unless I can see the holes that the nails made in his hands and can put my finger into the holes they made, and unless I can put my hand into his side, I refuse to believe.’

Eight days later the disciples were in the house again and Thomas was with them. The doors were closed, but Jesus came in and stood among them. ‘Peace be with you,’ he said. Then he spoke to Thomas, ‘Put your finger here; look, here are my hands. Give me your hand; put it into my side. Do not be unbelieving any more but believe.’

Thomas replied, ‘My Lord and my God!’

Jesus said to him: You believe because you can see me. Blessed are those who have not seen and yet believe.

There were many other signs that Jesus worked in the sight of the disciples, but they are not recorded in this book.

These are recorded so that you may believe that Jesus is the Christ, the Son of God, and that believing this you may have life through his name.

Brief Analysis and Comparison of the Resurrection and Post-Resurrection Narratives >>

MUSIC MEDITATIONS

Christ in Me Arise—Trevor Thomson

Our God is Here—Chris Muglia (Praise and Worship)

We Remember--Mary Haugen

Come Thou Font of every Blessing—Mormon Tabernacle Choir

OPENING PRAYER

Dear Lord, often we are ordinary persons, knotted up in our own worries and concerns that we cannot see your presence among us. Our doubts and fears often get in the way of our peace and growth. Help us to believe, more, to trust more, to rejoice more in your love and your company.

COMPANIONS FOR THE JOURNEY

Adapted from “First Impressions” 2019, by Father Jude Siciliano, O.P., a service of the southern Dominican Province:

My first response to today’s gospel is, “Thank God for Thomas.” We are a long way removed from this event. As a modern person reading different resurrection accounts, I note variations in the details. I tend to want more accuracy in the stories so that I can show them to others and say, “Here, this is what really happened, all the witnesses agree.” That kind of coalescence of details would satisfy my need for neatness and my penchant for order. I would feel reassured. But would some newspaper report of the events two thousand years ago build my faith, help me believe when in crisis, keep me going over the long haul of discipleship? I wonder.

What we have instead, are stories filled with chaos and confusion. Everyone seems caught off guard by the resurrection. It was a surprise to them as they struggled to deal with something that was completely beyond their experience. So, Thomas’ skepticism sounds real to me. I would have responded similarly, because I respond that way these days. My doubts and struggles don’t go away, but are there despite my faith. I like it that someone I can identify with was on the scene, attempting to throw the cold water of “reality” on what must have been an ecstatic group of disciples. Since I wasn’t there, I want someone to speak my case. Thomas, who missed the first appearance in the upper room, stands in for us who are long removed from these events. His need for help in believing speaks our own needs as we survey a world that acts so contrary to resurrection and new life.

In addition, my own church appears to lack the vibrant faith of a resurrection-based community of believers. If we believe in the resurrection, why aren’t we a more alive community at Sunday worship? Why aren’t we, in a time of multiple military engagements, more outspoken witnesses for the shalom-peace Jesus wishes for his friends in the upper room? Our society needs a strong community’s voice to speak critically to a world of prejudice, fear, hatred, exploitation and oppression. Recent clergy scandals chip away at my resurrection faith as well. I stand with Thomas, hearing about resurrection, but sometimes feeling very removed from any vibrant manifestation of its reality. I am glad Thomas spoke up. I am glad he wrestled, as I do, with doubts. I am even happier that the risen Christ took all this into consideration and made that extra appearance–a return trip to the upper room- just to help a disciple work through his doubts and arrive at faith.

I suspect the early church, rather than denigrate Thomas as the weak link in the chain of faith, saw this story as a treasure. From the beginning there were naysayers who denied the resurrection and held the central belief of the church up to ridicule. For them the first community could point to Thomas, who also was a naysayer and attest, here is one who also doubted and then came to believe. Jesus’ passing through the locked doors of that room suggests he wasn’t and isn’t restricted by any place and time. So for us gathered at worship, we invite that same Christ to come to us, see our doubts and struggles and reassure our faith, we who haven’t seen, but try to believe. The risen Christ greets his frightened followers with a greeting of peace—“Shalom.” This was more than a “hello,” more than a “calm down, get a grip.” Remember earlier in this gospel Jesus promised his peace, “Peace I leave with you....” Today he bids his peace to them twice. They will take his peace into the world, empowered by the Spirit he breathes on them. We are reminded, as Jesus breathes on his disciples, of God’s breathing into the humans God formed from clay in Genesis. We are being created anew, with the life and breath of the Risen One. Now his followers will be able to live and preach his message of peace. God’s shalom was the promise made through the prophets. God would create a new community of believers who would practice forgiveness and harmonious relations, they too would be bearers of shalom, as Jesus was.

We are not merely looking back on one historical moment. Rather, whenever Christians practice forgiveness, overcome death in its daily guises–hatred, deceit, indifference, contention, violence, prejudice, etc —then the Spirit of Christ is alive and well in believers and the resurrection is expressed again in this moment and this time. We can’t “prove” the resurrection to non-believers, not even with this story of doubting Thomas. But we certainly can be fingers pointing to it whenever we are signs that the life of Christ has not been extinguished, but is enfleshed in his modern followers.

Most of us gathered for worship this Sunday probably don’t share the disciples’ fear. They feared for their lives; they had seen what had happened to Jesus. As his followers, they could expect similar treatment, so they locked themselves in to keep danger out. While we probably don’t have their limiting fears, we may have their initial doubts. They had heard Mary Magdalene’s report of the empty tomb (Easter Sunday’s gospel) and her meeting with the risen Christ (20:10-16). But her report was not enough to overcome their doubts. This may be the way Jesus’ message about not being afraid applies to us—he could be telling us not to be afraid because of our doubts. Don’t let our doubts paralyze us; instead of drawing on them, we must lean more on the faith we do have. In addition, we don’t stand alone in these doubts, we belong to a community whose members also struggle with their doubts. Our community worshiping around us today doesn’t consist of some doubters and other believers; it is comprised of believers who wrestle with doubts. Thomas with his doubts, surrendered to belief before the risen Lord. In fact, even seeing the risen Christ wasn’t initially enough for Thomas to have full faith.

Faith, it seems from today’s story, has to go beyond seeing and touching with our physical senses. Instead, like Thomas, the risen Christ encourages a leap of faith, “...do not be unbelieving, but believe.” Thomas is a reminder today that our journey of faith includes doubt. We are fortunate to be among those Jesus called “blessed.” We have trusted the gospel news of the resurrection, have embraced it as our faith and have gone about living as people who draw life from a Spirit that had been breathed into each one of us.

If the resurrection has been told in any other way, we would have felt distant from it. Struggling with our incompleteness, the darkness of faith and the hurts we have experienced and observed in others, the last thing we need is a resurrected savior who comes to disciples all spanking clean and spruced up! This would have made him too removed from our lives. Instead, while he is resurrected, he still shows signs of his dwelling among us—his wounds. It was through his wounds, not in spite of them, that he was identifiable to those left behind. It was through these same wounds that we received our life. Our wounds do not set us apart from Jesus, indeed, they are signs of our union with him. And his wounds assure us we shall not be defeated by all that assails us. When Jesus enters the locked room where his frightened disciples are holed up in fear, he doesn’t come in a blaze of glory, surrounded by angelic powers and blinding light. He comes with his wounds---the wounded savior comes to his wounded disciples. Like us, his sojourn has dealt him heavy blows, he too has been battered. Since we all have wounds, Jesus shared even that with us. He wasn’t a casual visitor who just passed through our lives, an observer not fully involved.

Whenever we experience them in our lives, our wounds don’t have to defeat us. They link us to one another and to the risen Christ. His resurrection helps us bear these wounds and gives us hope that we are being healed of them. But even before complete healing happens, we know that in our own woundedness, we meet Christ, who comes through any barriers we may set up to cover our hurts. He would be with us where we are most protective and locked up---and there bring us his peace.

WEEKLY MEMORIZATION

Taken from the gospel for today's session….

My Lord and My God

LIVING THE GOOD NEWS

What action can you take in the next week as a response to today's reading and discussion?

Keep a private journal of your prayer/actions responses this week. Feel free to use the personal reflection questions which follow:

Reflection Questions:

Jesus entered that room through locked doors. Are the doors of my heart locked to Jesus?

Jesus saw something in Thomas’ heart that others missed. Do I believe that Jesus sees into the deepest regions of my poor and doubting heart?

If Thomas had to get away from the group for a while to process his grief and loss, he might not have been quite ready emotionally to believe a new reality when he has just begun to come to acceptance of the old one. Are there times when we are afraid to trust in joy or good news for fear we will be disappointed and devastated all over again?

In this gospel, all of the other disciples in that room, except Thomas, had seen Jesus for themselves. What Thomas was asked to do was take their testimony and believe it. Do I ever question the credibility of the witnesses to Jesus I find in scripture?

Am I Thomas's twin?

Thomas is the quintessential modern man, skeptical of easy answers and cheap grace. Have I ever said "I believe it when I see it."?

How unrealistic is it for me to believe what I have never seen?

Is it only honest to admit this?

75% of our knowledge comes from accepting the word of others. We tend to have a hard time accepting that about which we are already skeptical or accepting that which we do not like to hear. Have I ever resisted the truth of a situation because it made me uncomfortable?

Have I ever resisted the truth of a situation because it required me to change?

How many of us like Thomas, make grand statements of principle, but have trouble following through?

Can I speak to Jesus honestly about my fears and my doubts?

Can I ever admit to Jesus that I sometimes have trouble believing?

Thomas might have been so devastated by the death of Jesus that he was afraid to hope in the resurrection. Have I ever been in a situation in which I felt that it hurt too much to hope?

Have you ever had a religious experience that was out of the ordinary?

How did you respond?

How did this experience affect your life?

Has there ever been a time in your life when you felt hopeless or lost?

Was Jesus present in this experience?

Has it ever been difficult for you to believe in the fact that Jesus lives? Have you ever doubted the possibility of life after death?

Have I ever had a strong intimation of the power and majesty of God?

When?

How did it change me?

Most walk through life so far with doubt on one arm and faith/trust on the other. What are my doubts or fears?

In what or whom do I trust?

Thomas's doubts grew when he was away from the community. When we doubt, we tend to give up, go away, drop out. Has this ever happened to me?

Did I seek out other doubters or did I look for ways to stay strong and live with those doubts together with others going through the same things and hanging in there?

How does my community of faith support me in my doubts or fears?

How do I hang on to my beliefs in a climate of skepticism and cynicism which is so prevalent in our culture today?

Do my doubts multiply in a climate of unbelief?

Can I admit my doubts or do I mask them with bravado?

What are some of the wounds I have sustained during my life?

Have they permanently disfigured me, or has the healing power of Christ and of human love made those scars badges of honor?

Does Christ enter into human experience through his own wounds?

Did you notice that Jesus' response was to welcome Thomas into his very wounds, his sorrow?

Do I think Jesus understands my doubts, my fears, and welcomes me home?

Too often we judge ourselves harshly because we remember " Blessed are those who have not seen and believed?" Well, good for them! But do I understand that I am loved and accepted by God, no matter where I am in my faith journey?

Like Thomas, we sometimes set conditions for our belief and trust in God, demanding that He hear our prerequisites for belief or acceptance. Why is this such a human trait?

Do we sometimes behave this way with others in our lives?

Is there a climate of unbelief in our society? What in our culture undermines trust/belief? What supports it?

Did I skip over the part int his gospel where Jesus says: “As the Father has sent me, so I send you”?

What challenge is there for me in this statement?

Meditations

A Quote for the Week:
from Rainier Marie Rilke: “Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms and like books that are now written in a very foreign tongue. Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps you will then gradually, without noticing it, live along some distant day into the answer.”

A Meditation in the Dominican Style/Asking Questions:

Thomas was forever known as “doubting Thomas” because he at first refused to believe his fellow disciples when they told him what they had seen. What we sometimes forget to see in this gospel is that Thomas went beyond what he saw in the person of Jesus in that upper room, and was the first to recognize that Jesus was more than his resurrected self, more than his wounds. He saw that Jesus was God. Thomas was not doubting at all in the Jesus who stood before him; in fact he was expressing a more radical faith than any of the others had uttered. Thomas was willing to let go of his doubts and fears because of his utter faith in the divine Jesus. Thomas had no proof of this divinity; his faith must have come from a special gift of the Holy Spirit which allowed him to see beyond the physical to the mystical. He could not do this on his own. In my own life, have I ever had doubts or second-guessed my beliefs and assumptions? How willing was I to accept a new and more radical reality? Have I ever, like the father of the epileptic child in Mark (9:24), prayed: “I believe; help my unbelief”? Do I realize that sometimes we have to take “ a leap of faith”to trust our own instincts, to trust others, to trust the process of living ad dying? How hard is that?

A Meditation in the Ignation Style/Imagination,

freely adapted from “Sacred Space”, a service of the Irish Jesuits:

I imagine that I am one of the disciples there in the room when Jesus first appears. How shocked am I? Am I fearful? Comforted? Why do I think Jesus shows me his hands and his side? Does everyone in my community “see” that this is really the resurrected Jesus? Does it happen to each of us all at once, or is there a different pace of recognition for each of us? In my role as disciple in the upper room, am I at all hesitant to believe what I am seeing? How do I feel when Jesus says: ”Peace be with you”? What does it feel like when Jesus breathes on me and tells me to receive the Holy Spirit? Do I have any idea what he is talking about? When Thomas returns, do I rush to tell him what excitement he has missed? How do I feel when he rejects my testimony and demands some sort of proof? Do I feel this is this a rejection of Jesus or a rejection of my own personal experience of Jesus?

When Thomas actually does encounter Jesus himself, he seems to forget his former need for proof. Did Jesus look into his heart and see the need that was there?

In my own life, do I ever feel that my experience of Jesus is special to me, and feel superior to those whose belief is harder won or even non-existent? In my own faith experience, do hope that God looks beyond my first reaction, my hasty words, and sees the need in me for love, for reassurance, for comfort? I sit quietly in Jesus ‘ presence and listen for his voice, being open to whatever he offers me. I resolve to give Jesus not just my intellectual belief, but to give him my heart, because he has already given me his.

A Meditation in the Franciscan Style/Action:

Read Psalm 116b,

10I trusted, even when I said, “I am sorely afflicted,”

 11and when I said in my alarm, “These people are all liars.”

12How can I repay the LORD for all his goodness to me?

13The cup of salvation I will raise; I will call on the name of the LORD.

14My vows to the LORD I will fulfill  before all his people.

 15too costly in the eyes of the LORD is the death of his faithful.

16Your servant, LORD, your servant am I, the son of your handmaid; you have loosened my bonds.

 17A thanksgiving sacrifice I make; I will call on the name of the LORD.

18My vows to the LORD I will fulfill before all his people,

 19in the courts of the house of the LORD, in your midst, O Jerusalem.

Alleluia

Note especially line 15: "Too costly in the eyes of the Lord is the death of his faithful." Within our community and our world there are innocent children and adults who are the victims of poverty and violence caused by war, greed, and political divisions. Seek out an organization dedicated to change the world for the better, such as Pax Christi, Physicians without Borders, Catholic Relief Services or any organization supporting Ukraine and learn as much as you can about what one individual can do to change things. Resolve to do ONE THING this week to aid the cause of justice and peace, whether it is learning more about an issue, donating money, or actually giving time to an organization or even just an individual who might need your help in a time of personal darkness. Pray for the Ukrainian people and for the Russian people.

Literary Reflection:

Read and enjoy the following poem by Michael Kennedy, S.J.

Nail Holes

(2nd Sunday of Easter)

****

Of all the places

In the entire world Thomas was

Absent from the place where Jesus

Appeared and he must have wondered

Why in the world he chose to be gone

That night since he had decided he

Needed a break from the disciples

Who were trapped into a never

Ending contest of second

Guessing and so a week

Later Thomas made it

A goal that he would

Be present if the

Master came to

Them again

****

And as much as we

Admire and praise all the disciples

Perhaps our biggest thanks should

Go to Thomas for he showed the

Other disciples and us that

Asking questions with even

A skeptical mind was not

Only a good idea but

Probably mandatory as

The quick response of

The Risen Lord

Would seem to

Indicate

****

For Thomas gives

All followers of Jesus

Permission to question even the

Most central part of our faith

So that after all is said and

Done one of the center points

After that first Easter

Is quietly and simply

The nail holes

****

Literary Reflection:

This is a lovely meditation (from a site called “Eleison”) on a poem by Denise Levertov, late a professor of English at Stanford University, who converted to Catholicism while she was here in her sixties and who wrote a Mass for the Day of St. Thomas (also called Mass for the Sunday of St. Thomas).: Especially on this Sunday I am reminded of the poem “St. Thomas Didymus” by Denise Levertov. In her poem she exquisitely expresses both Thomas’ doubt as well as the beautiful revelation of the risen Lord. She draws a parallel between Thomas’ doubt and the epileptic’s father who exclaimed, “I believe Lord, help my unbelief.” Often, like Thomas, I struggle with doubts of my own. I often doubt that God will tend to me and provide for me as I walk the narrow way, stewarding my sexuality. I fear loneliness, rejection, isolation, and unhappiness as the result of my celibacy. However, I find much comfort in knowing that like Thomas I can express and speak aloud my doubts and like Thomas not be rejected for my doubt but met by the Risen Lord so I may cry, “You are my Lord and my God.”

St. Thomas Didymus 

In the hot street at noon I saw him

a small man

gray but vivid, standing forth

beyond the crowd’s buzzing

holding in desperate grip his shaking

teethgnashing son,

and thought him my brother.

I heard him cry out, weeping, and speak

those words,

Lord, I believe, help thou

mine unbelief,

and knew him

my twin:

a man whose entire being

had knotted itself

into the one tight drawn question,

Why,

why has this child lost his childhood in suffering,

why is this child who will soon be a man

tormented, torn twisted?

Why is he cruelly punished

who has done nothing except be born?

The twin of my birth

was not so close

as that man I heard

say what my heart

sighed with each beat, my breath silently

cried in and out,

in and out.

After the healing,

he, with his wondering

newly peaceful boy, receded;

no one

dwells on the gratitude, the astonished joy,

the swift

acceptance and forgetting.

I did not follow

to see their changed lives.

What I retained

was the flash of kinship.

Despite

all that I witnessed,

his question remained

my question, throbbed like a stealthy cancer,

known

only to doctor and patient. To others

I seemed well enough.

So it was

that after Golgotha

my spirit in secret

lurched in the same convulsed writhings

that tore that child

before he was healed.

And after the empty tomb

when they told me He lived, had spoken to Magdalen,

told me

that though He had passed through the door like a ghost

He had breathed on them

the breath of a living man-

even then

when hope tried with a flutter of wings

to lift me-

still, alone with myself,

my heavy cry was the same: Lord,

I believe,

help thou mine unbelief.

I needed

blood to tell me the truth,

the touch

of blood. Even

my sight of the dark crust of it

round the nailholes

didn’t thrust its meaning all the way through

to that manifold knot in me

that willed to possess all knowledge,

refusing to loosen

unless that insistence won

the battle I fought with life.

But when my hand

led by His hand’s firm clasp

entered the unhealed wound,

my fingers encountering

rib-bone and pulsing heat,

what I felt was not

scalding pain, shame for my obstinate need,

but light, light streaming

into me, over me, filling the room

as if I had lived till then

in a cold cave, and now

coming forth for the first time,

the knot that bound me unravelling,

I witnessed

all things quicken to color, to form,

my question

not answered but given

its part

in a vast unfolding design lit

by a risen sun.

CLOSING PRAYER

From Sacred Space 2022, a service of the Irish Jesuits:

Help us, Lord, to be before you and to hear your word in this time of prayer. You know the needs of our minds, You have heard our words. Now, let us listen to your voice and know your presence. We lay aside our demands and receive what it is you offer to us.